Thank you

This is a personal thank you note to all my friends....that even if we are far away from one another, I'm only a call away. It's a very personal note so bear with me...

From those of you that know me, you know that I have an insatiable need to live, to love and to be loved, to protect, to heal, but most of all nowadays to know myself...

I used to have an insatiable need to eat, it used to be all consuming, I used to wake up and go to bed thinking about connoseur ice cream, you know the one, cafe grande, the one with the almonds in it and grand marnier sauce, the one that I don't think about any more...the one that I used to produce at dinner parties as desert....meanwhile eating myself into oblivion so I could hide what I was feeling and procrastinate, and as you know I'm a great procrastinator...

I then realised that food was just a cover so that I could mask things out, the erosion in my soul when my parents fought, my Polyanna attitude in trying to see the good and the light in everyone...the money problems that we used to have and the fact that whenever we had money problems everyone would run away...and come back again when things would be right again.

So all these things made me go into my shell, eat my ice cream and not want to come back out again...

Thankfully since then I have found better friends, it's easy to have friends like the above mentioned, but hard to have friends like the ones I have now.

I had sooo wished that someone would come and save me and make all my problems go away, but then I realised something...

I can save myself...!!!

I can decide for myself to do things and if it's meant to be then it's up to me.

That to be bailed out of a situation is not actually doing me any good, but to actually find solutions on my own is so self empowering and self growing that I really wished it would have happened sooner so I can grow quicker....

So to all those friends who have bailed me out of a situation just like I used to do, THANK YOU!!!
I DO SO LOVE YOU AND APPRECIATE YOU!!!

To those who haven't bailed me out of situations but offered me viable solutions so I can work things out on my own, A Double thank you!!!! I AM ETERNALLY GRATEFULL!!!

To those who didn't even know what has been happening....you're probably not a close friend and not reading this post... So nah nah- nah nah nah!!!

Love you and miss you all!!!!!

T